It’s been an interesting month so far. With just a bit of chaos bleeding into it. I am fed up with aching too. Its tiring.
Yes it is but keep smiling won’t you all.
Showbiz is all tarnished glitter though and bullshit. People want me in bands because of my skill set (Bands of a certain age that is, of course). If I had to trade on my looks as well I would be fucked pretty much (I do seem to be the acceptable face of Trans to a degree though). I do have to make an effort though to the extent that I don’t frighten the horses and look OK on publicity stuff too. I think I often look a bit like a younger slimmer version of Myriam Margolyes in photo’s. That’s not the worst look and my slightly olive skin tone allied with a generous nose might make people think my ancestry is Mediterranean so that makes me look a bit less weird I think.
I am not really a youngster and even when I was in my 50’s I had days like this. Maybe I just expect too much at times. I am mostly more physically active than I have been for a couple of years and I simply forget it does catch up. The fact that I have a passion for music drives me one at times when the easy chair would perhaps have ensnared me permanently.
The Cowper and Newton Museum at Olney gig was very well attended, people really enjoyed it. Many compliments about my violin playing. One from a local classical player who was really knocked out by it. Slightly different to that which was planned as Jon was an hour and a half late, stuck in traffic. So Annette, Bob and I did a 35 minute set of our own to open. Jon then did his interview with the Historian chap, then we played the Olney hymns set afterwards. Jon sold a couple of Cd’s. We will do it again next summer if we are spared. The Museum people were very helpful and nothing was too much trouble it seemed. If you are bored one day do check out the museum and garden as its well worth seeing.
Recent weird nightmares have included being experimented on by some weird Victorian Dr mad scientist chased me with a big brass needle and injection things. I hid in a loo. Then I was hitting him with a chair and stuff over the head but he persisted….
A recent visit to the dentists, got myself a new electric toothbrush. Used one for years and a lot less bother than all that flossing business, but the old one died a few months back. My my teeth are OK so I l might as well try and keep them that way I suppose. My mouth’s a bit sore after the cleaning and polish. Still I suppose some people I know would pay good money to be tortured by a reasonably attractive women for 20 minutes…
The Covid thing has thrown me a bit. maybe in a month I will be more like my old self again? I am intend to start sorting stuff out a bit. I have a load of boxes using up space that I doubt I’ll ever need again. A mess makes me feel more confused than I actually am. I am still finding it hard to get on with stuff, its all a bit more uphill than usual. I could sit here staring in to space all day. Brain fog? I still seem to be on the one day OK next one knackered again cycle. I just need to take it easy.
Most of the time when my mental health issues present its is as anxiety and often irrational paranoia, but these two old friends don’t call as often as they used to.
The more company I get the better I am to an extent. It would be nice to have some purely social stuff occasionally but you can’t have everything
I have slightly overdosed on the nostalgia. I have been putting a lot of pictures on Instagram in the last couple of days, and suddenly felt a bit melancholic. Ho hum. The guitar part that I couldn’t get right went OK today which was pleasing so I finished that recording. I really should be sorting out my music room a bit, but there is not really enough time to do it or at least that’s my excuse anyway.Interestingly there is some research on cortisol and long Covid and/or slow recovery. Cortisol becomes depleted and below its normal level so whilst you don’t feel stressed, your adrenaline doesn’t kick in so you cannot rev up the engine at all.
I will take some vit D for a week or so which might help.
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