Monthly Archives: November 2021

Rolling Along Just About

Winter nights again. if your not sitting in a front of a blazing wood burner many aspects of it are not terribly appealing though. 
 I am not a big fan of Christmas generally. Or perhaps its current incarnation. Still I suppose I should be used to it by now. I have after all had a few at this point in my life.  Still never mind, I am sure others will be able to fill the festive energy gap if I can’t totally get with the program.
So as usual music and more music and bla, bla bla.  Getting up is a struggle now. I just can’t get the motivation. 

I have just had the first rehearsal with the new band and its looking hopeful. Plenty of smiling faces by the end. And some reasonably musical noises made, so a good start at least.I did blank completely on arrival though. Also I felt quite nervous as it’s been quite a while since I played with any new people. Starting to interact socially more is a bit weird as its been a long time since I met new people. Plus having got conditioned to being locked down I am now getting cabin fever having actually had some social interaction again. 

The combination of Covid-19 and Brexit and personal loss means that the world feels very different to me now in many regards.  So I shall carry on day to day and not  dwell on looking  to far into the future which feels very uncertain to me now. 

The time of life is short! / To spend that shortness basely were too long
Or possibly then as Nike say:

Just do it 


Out with the Old and in with the?

I am not a big fan of November.  I have said it….

So things are starting to to happen it seems. The first rehearsal with the band I have joined  is now in the book. Its a while since I was last in a practice room. 2004 was the last time when I was auditioning for a band called Elephant Shelf in a place in Barnet  A full circle almost.  So I am learning a few songs I never thought I would ever attempt to play.  It is a challenge as its very different to anything I have done for a very long time as it requires a very different mindset. Will it work? I hope so.

It occured to me that at times i do feel a bit useless, regardless of what I may or may not have achieved. Again though may be its too much time ruminating. I did manage to do a few things today, despite feeling a bit off. We have been living here for nearly 4 years now. This years been tough mentally though. so I do hope that the few green shoots that have sprung up in the last couple of months socially and musically can be nourished and sustained.

Today has been a tough one. The ongoing  problems with my back and related issues continue. Some days are better than others. Exercise helps but its hard when your aching even though you know that it will help. Getting out of bed is an effort recently as I just can’t  seem to be bothered.  I am still feeling anxious too a lot of the time.  Keeping busy helps  a bit though.  
So here is a very recent recording. 

See what you think 





The days grow short when you reach…You know the rest.

It’s been pleasant and sunny and autumnal as you would expect from the time of year.
So what’s new?    The routine goes on as ever, practicing, writing, recording taking exercise and pondering the infinite. So the same old same old really. Plus a bit of anxiety creeping up on me again. I get to sleep OK but have constant dreaming it seems so I wake feeling exhausted.
As I write this I am also not in my happy place, I am in my grumpy place. Just because.  There is a glimmer on the horizon of some distant fresh new dawn but. At the time of writing I should have been at a rehearsal which was cancelled at short notice so I find myself at even more of a loose end than normal. I have also hit my tea saturation level.  I am not cooking up any new tunes at this moment either. Its Diwali and tomorrow is bonfire night so there has been a bit of random banging echoing through the dark.  My joints are rather sore too. My head is empty though of ideas and words at present. But hey that’s never stopped me before. I have decided if nothing much occurs I may just try and join a pub band to get a few bob extra come 2022. I get these mad ideas from time to time…..
Perhaps I need to lie down in a darkened room until the thought goes away. I had along phone call with a friend about a few things that are troubling me and that helped me quite a bit.