Category Archives: music

Groundhog Day anybody?

Diana Stones Songs, glass cage, history, music, Musings, pictures, whatever, , ,

A certain slow rhythm has crept into my life and established itself. But the days are very similar at present.

I am not feeling that good really to be honest. I feel very isolated and somewhat threatened by malevolent forces that whilst they don’t yet affect the way I live may do. That’s my honest answer. For somebody like me that struggles with anxiety as well as bipolar everything I see chips away at my confidence or sours my enjoyment of things. It takes the colour out of life at present. So not good. Yesterday afternoon after going to the bank in Bedford I came home and sat in a chair and did nothing for about 3 hours. I did have a headache as well. Everything from Gaza to Ukraine to Trump to the resurgence of barely disguised neo-nationalism and the legitimised hate speech now starting to come from government is pretty depressing. The interpretation of the SC judgment by the EC commission is of course horrendous.

With that regard as I have said most older trans folk from my generation will not be complying with guidance. At some point there will be incidents I feel. I keep my faith in individuals but government has now lost my trust completely. To see video of labour politicians stating on video support for trans people whilst the election was on and now to hear those same politicians being either silent or like Starmer to say the polar opposite when in power has made me lose faith in notion of these people having any moral compass what so ever. So what’s the fucking point. They all sell out for the 30 pieces of silver in the end. At least Farage is honest. Vote for me and my new brown shirts and we will carry on where they left off.

Without PR there is no way to change anything. If the 16 year olds that do bother to vote in the next election do so in any significant number I wonder what they will vote for. The young people I meet I find to be mostly OK, but then they are likely to be music or arty creative types. I notice that trades people i have met dont drop a beat gas man and forth these days. So I would say day to day trans people are not perceived as partially noticeable or strange. You can tell from people’s facial expressions usually.

What I see in how people are in regard to their behaviours to me in the real world does not reflect what I see expressed on line. Is that passing privilege or nearly politeness or a bit of both? But the world feels a more hostile place generally. There was always double dealing and corruption in high places of course. I wonder what a post Trump world we be like. There is mass civil disobedience in the USA with regard to the ICE raids and a lot of farmers crops are rotting in the fields now as the illegals they relied on are not showing up. I watched videos where some farmers were shocked to find that they couldn’t hire black Americans to feel the gaps. Trumps rhetoric suggested that they would be mostly unemployed. Of course they are not. A lot of US towns are racially divided. So so places In Texas are mostly Hispanic. People out of the big city’s live very separately and don’t mix. These are regressive times. It seems to have started to change dramatically around 2015 onwards. In the UK Brexit has triggered allsorts of toxic stuff. So basically it’s the end of the enlightenment really. So things are not going to get better without a crisis of cataclysmic proportions.

Other than that every is fine.

I have expressed an interest in JCs new party as yet unnamed party.

https://www.yourparty.uk/statement

“It’s time for a new kind of political party. One that belongs to you. The system is rigged. The system is rigged when 4.5 million children live in poverty in the sixth richest country in the world. The system is rigged when giant corporations make a fortune from rising bills. The system is rigged when this government says there is no money for the poor, but billions for war. We cannot accept these injustices – and neither should you. We will only fix the crises in our society with a mass redistribution of wealth and power. That means taxing the very richest in our society. That means an NHS free from privatisation and bringing energy, water, rail and mail into public ownership. That means investing in a massive council-house building programme. That means standing up to fossil fuel giants putting their profits before our planet. Meanwhile, millions of people are horrified by the government’s complicity in crimes against humanity. Now, more than ever, we must defend the right to protest against genocide. We believe in the radical idea that all human life has equal value. That is why we will keep demanding an end to all arms sales to Israel, and for the only path to peace: a free and independent Palestine”

Our movement is made up of people of all faiths and none. The great dividers want you to think that the problems in our society are caused by migrants or refugees. They’re not. They are caused by an economic system that protects the interests of corporations and billionaires. It is ordinary people who create the wealth – and it is ordinary people who have the power to put it back where it belongs.

It’s time for a new kind of political party. One that is rooted in our communities, trade unions and social movements. One that builds power in all regions and nations. One that belongs to you.

Sign up at www.yourparty.uk to be part of the founding process, leading to an inaugural conference. At this conference, you will decide the party’s direction, the model of leadership and the policies that are needed to transform society. That is how we build a democratic movement that can take on the rich and powerful – and win.

Real change is coming.

Jeremy Corbyn MP & Zarah Sultana MP

Lets keep our fingers crossed and hope for a better day.
We dare to dream still


Lions Mane

Delta Ladies, Diana Stones Songs, glass cage, music, Musings, whatever

Lions Mane, does it work? Maybe. I have been taking it for about 3 weeks approx now and I feel it has made me less fatigued and mentally a little sharper, but also less depressed. That’s a major benefit if it really is working. it’s not expensive and it’s been in use for centuries’ apparently so I feel it is worth a go.

A new song:

Wondering If You Could Tell Me

Currently a few things are on the boil and the car is still not running yet, though work is in hand.

One of the hardest things things I have found to deal with is the fact that so many of us are seen as one dimensional figures through the filter of social media. For that reason I am very careful to try and not be dismissive of others as often they may well have a back story and wealth of experience that one is totally unaware of.

Conversely I forget that people will also of course not be aware of much of what I have done, been involved in doing over the years outside the field of music. But it can grate a bit when you have do have technical knowledge and experience in a certain field to have to justify yourself to people that have not even bothered to check their own facts first before starting a debate/argument. I guess that is the human experience.

A friend sadly now no longer with us used to get very upset after doing favours and helping people out to find that rarely if ever was it reciprocal. My friend was a perpetual optimist it must be said but was often taken in believing that everything was transactional. Its difficult to find a balance. I have found people often commit to things that in reality they will not be able to do even if they take a sacred oath or sign a parchment at midnight in blood . So if I am able to help somebody out I try to do it with no expectations of any sort of reward because it seems to be the thing to do. If a little good comes back to me that’s a bonus. Sometimes the people that you have the highest expectations of turn out to be the ones least lightly to throw you a life belt….

It seems to me at present that I am a little bit stuck again and I am not entirely sure what my next move should be. I am not as fatigued as I was at Christmas which is helping. But I am lacking a bit of magic generally. My mission this year has to be to try and make some local acquaintances if not friends. Maybe it’s not possible of course but it’s worth a try. I lost trans friends because a lot of mine transitioned and had GRS and that became there life to the exclusion of other things. By the time they were post op and settled we did not have much on common. As I mentioned many were successful people with there shit together. I was invited on holidays but couldn’t afford it. That sort of thing. There was also a sort of trans apartheid with many separatists who though us non surgical types were frivolous dilettantes to contend with and also 17 years of not being around due to playing gigs. My problems were maybe self inflicted a little as I didn’t give time to my mental health and wellbeing in terms of dealing with gender issues that I could have discussed with others maybe?