Category Archives: Musings

Just A Dream

Musings

The world divided, in turmoil.

Aaron Bushnell killed himself in protest.

On February 25, 2024, Aaron Bushnell, a 25-year-old serviceman of the United States Air Force, approached the Embassy of Israel in Washington, D.C., and committed an act of self-immolation at the front gate to protest what he called genocide being committed by Israel in the Israel-Hamas war. During the incident, Bushnell said he was protesting “what people have been experiencing in Palestine at the hands of their colonizers” and declared that he “will no longer be complicit in genocide” before dousing himself with gasoline and lighting himself on fire. As he burned, Bushnell repeatedly shouted “Free Palestine!” while local emergency services arrived on scene.

But nothing changes or will change…

Old men decide to go war, politicians.

Nothing changes…

FOMO and more

Musings

Well I messed up again. I tried to get along to a songwriters showcase locally to listen and didn’t get through the door. I have had a really bad time in the last few weeks trying to do stuff on my own to form a few more connections in my local area and its not working. I have lost a lot of confidence recently again I think, after building it up again. I am not too sure why.
My levels of anxiety have dropped over the last couple of years which is good. I do feel a little burned-out. It’s mental and physical as I have feel tired. To often I am looking for excuses not to do things. Most mornings its a real struggle to get out of bed too. Partly due to arthritis, but by no means entirely. My mental health always seems to hit the lowest ebb between February and March. This year though after doing OK even through lockdown I seem to have lost my mojo again. I am living vicariously through social media. So what’s the answer? I haven’t got a clue. But I do have ongoing projects and I have gigs in the book with the acts I play in so actually maybe it’s not so bad.

Sonic Boomers band

This lot are in part my salvation for live performances again. I don’t lack confidence performing at all, though I do sometimes get a bit anxious beforehand. My problem is all about trying to meet new people. I am hopeless at it. I really am.

Anyway here is a tune of mine from last year:


A lot of Anger Pointed At The Wrong People

Delta Ladies, Diana Stones Songs, glass cage, music, Musings, other, Piano

When I was in my 20s to 30’s I can honestly say I lived a fairly sheltered life. But when a set of circumstances caused me to change to a very different sort of working environment I was slowly but surely exposed to many challenges about how I thought the world was, as opposed to how it actually is or was. My eyes and ears were opened. Even now though I am still stunned by much that I see and hear from supposedly educated people. Times and circumstances changed and new lessons were learned. At least in my case I believe, but perhaps it is not the same for others? And it’s difficult to have any sort of reasoned discussion with anyone quite often now. Also facts are considered to be subjective and mutable now and the thing called alternate truth which apparently exists now. It’s difficult for me to really clearly define what is happening as my vocabulary often feels inadequate when I respond. I am always worried that my comments might be misinterpreted and misunderstood.

There seem to be so many fake profiles on facebook now. I have just seen one with a verified tick but the profile name bears no relation to the url? Bot perhaps or good old fashioned troll.

Due to a set of unexpected circumstances’ I find I have a rather low key week ahead. I will try and make use of it somehow though if I can. I am keeping up the usual routine as much as I can.