This is a place I was not expecting to arrive at and where we go from here is another matter entirely. I have had a few recurring health issues that are making life a bit less fun. I am frustrated as I am just not able to do what I was planning on so easily. Some issued seem to be anxiety triggered as well. There is an underlying cause I am sure, but one that I don’t see any way of resolving at present. Also I can’t get what’s going on in the world out of my head. That’s in part due to my isolation to a degree.

I realised very recently that it’s not just my physical reserves that have dwindled but also my resolve generally and I can’t deal with emotional issues so well. If Vicky and I had been able to keep gigging a few more years we would I suspect by now have reached the limit. There is a huge gulf between what we would like to do and what we are still capable of. I can still play OK, but I am all about avoiding stress now. This band is mostly low maintenance so I can just let them chug along hopefully. My personal life is OK. My partner is good company when I need it so I am not lonely. She is comfortable enough though it is looking as she will end up not driving sooner rather than later. She doesn’t enjoy it now. So getting the other car back on the road may well be just to sell it if possible.

In the days when I was gigging 3 or 4 days a week and going with Vicky to get new gigs and help with interviews for Blues Matters and stuff I was in a very small flat but it did not matter as I was only in about 3 days a week day or so at most. So the environment did not matter so much as I was distracted by the other stuff going on. I would go barking mad if we were living there now.
We have space and every convenience on hand. Yesterday we had our first bulk supermarket delivery here. Makes life a lot easier.

Music pretty much has taken over my life. Writing it, playing it, recording it and listening too it. I just wish I had the stamina I had ten years back. So it’s my thing and it helps keep me sane (to a degree)