Another odd week, spending too much time in my own company perhaps? Maybe. I had a bad moment today but it passed. I have been working on a bit of music today as per usual. I suddenly felt very pissed off and angry for no reason just now. I should be happy enough, I have lots of music going on and new friends and should be OK financially in the new year. I still feel a bit isolated. Maybe its my just feeling insecure about ageing and the future and stuff like that?

I have seen the first video clip from the Church session with Jon Bickley and Annette and Bob a couple of weeks back. I am jolly pleased with it I must say.

Got into a weird Facebook chat last night and I think it might be another scammer. It Started like a normal how are you chat. I thought it was a person following my music but then we got the “I would like to know you better” phrase used twice, it was just weird, it seemed to then go towards chat up lines. Person seemed totally unaware of my musical exploits and expressed surprise so possibly from other comments you are beautiful etcetera just a bit of a pervert. But got upset when I said I was busy working on something in my studio, got annoyed and messaged me, you can’t still be working. It was about 10.00pm so I just blocked them. The tone of messages was a bit off. Might have to go a bit more Miriam Margolyes on my profile picture as I am getting the wrong followers… So either a scammer or lonely w****r literally.

I am a bit over saturated on the music front. Trying not to pump out musical diarrhea on my own compositions. A moratorium is required. If only being competent at something was enough. Still winter solstice next week, perhaps a cosmic reboot?

I am currently on a forum where Texans are conflating socialism with Hitler as in National Socialism, whoopee. Not getting involved in that thread. Nope. Its fascinating, another nation’s cultural understandings. The same poster that thinks social health care is the government stealing from them and is a regular church goer. They seen to me though very much like our own home-grown little britain nationalists. It has be said a lot of people of my musical acquaintance did vote Brexit and still rant about street people and immigrants. The whole ethos of the Rees Mogs and the Phillip Greens and the Murdochs is still “whilst the little people all fight each other, we can continue to live our best richest lives unopposed”. Thats never going to change is it?

I used to be able to write halfway decent song lyrics but I struggle now to string words together. It’s almost impossible now for some reason. Maybe I am just not connecting with people any more and there is a bit of of a barrier for some unknown reason? Overthinking it again I guess.
That’s me though every time.

Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all they have. H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”