This week has seen me mostly getting very, very depressed. I have been trying to keep busy as much as possible but the last few days have seen me grinding to a halt pretty much.  And I really really really have had more than enough of this lockdown malarky.   The PA system has been sitting in the downstairs  lock up since September although it was last used in February of  2020. I wonder if it still works?  I wonder if I will be getting  it out of mothballs this year at all?   We can of course dream can’t we. But maybe I will get in front of some sort of audience later this year again if I am lucky and my nerves hold out.  So many people I know have needed to shield this year too due to being clinically vulnerable as well.  To day I should have gone out somewhere but I couldn’t face it on my own with as Chuck Berry famously sung “No particular place to go”.  This strange hiatus seems to have lasted so long now and shifted my perspective on everything at least temporarily.
How things will be in the longer term is a whole other matter I believe. Perhaps the old other pre-covid me will kick back in again having risen from the depths of my psyche, or not.  I am a little worried as my voice seems to have gone on a permanent retreat and it was never a particularly strong one in the  first place. My voice has now taken on a definite gargling with rusty nails tambre over all.