Well yes those voices, are all at it again. Taking me into the panic-related places and the low self-esteem places, and all the various hamlets between the towns along the way. Its a bit freaky and my head is not co-operating at all.

I have been busy with music-related stuff but I seem to have hit saturation point now. I need to to take a little break but I really am left with nothing else to do and the weird thoughts are escalating at breakneck speed so I need to block them out but I am not succeeding at present. Basically I pretty much barking mad at the moment. Any attempt at distraction is hopeless.
The last few months have seen me get more and more obsessed with things that are completely beyond my control. I do not really have an anchor mentally. I am storm-tossed and my judgement is defective. Really I should be avoiding sharp objects and major decisions at all costs right now. I get good days and bad days of course but I can’t motivate my self at all and feel that everything I am doing is substandard. I have lost all perspective really. I need to stop but I can’t get away from myself. Where ever you go there you are 😉

I am worried about the future, I am also worried about if there is a future on a persona level. I am really rocking the neuroses right now.

“In 1954, the limbic cortex was described by neuroanatomists. Since that time, the limbic system of the brain has been implicated as the seat of emotion, addiction, mood, and lots of other mental and emotional processes. It is the part of the brain that is phylogenetically very primitive. Many people call it the “Lizard Brain,” because the limbic system is about all a lizard has for brain function. It is in charge of fight, flight, feeding, fear, freezing up, and fornication.”

That’s what’s rocking my world right now I think.

Or is it this:

“The amygdala is one of the best-understood brain regions with regard to differences between the sexes. The amygdala is larger in males than females in children ages 7–11,^[14] in adult humans,^[15] and in adult rats.^[16]

In addition to size, other functional and structural differences between male and female amygdalae have been observed. Subjects’ amygdala activation was observed when watching a horror film and subliminal stimuli. The results of the study showed a different lateralization of the amygdala in men and women. Enhanced memory for the film was related to enhanced activity of the left, but not the right, amygdala in women, whereas it was related to enhanced activity of the right, but not the left, amygdala in men.^[17] One study found evidence that on average, women tend to retain stronger memories for emotional events than men.^[18]

The right amygdala is also linked with taking action as well as being linked to negative emotions,^[9] which may help explain why males tend to respond to emotionally stressful stimuli physically. The left amygdala allows for the recall of details, but it also results in more thought rather than action in response to emotionally stressful stimuli, which may explain the absence of physical response in women.”

I have no clue, but its a real pain at the moment. I suspect this is coming across as the kind of incoherent drivel that Dominic Cummings might write. I say that having attempted to read one his papers.

Don’t lead me into temptation, or not….